So, people who follow my blog must get into a thought that i posts lame stuff and i agree i do because it may not be lame for me. I am a person who write and writes on all social mediums yet i get at a point when writing is the only solution i have may be to get out of my anxiety zone and i can not put my thoughts to anyone ears. Yet i want to departure in peace..
The feeling of loneliness is dreadful I have been through it once. Yet to get out of loneliness i can write only. When tear flow out all day long you keep on absorbing them in so that people around you do not know what you are through. You call it love. When you start hating long winter nights you call it love.
When you are left lonely yet in love, it is when love becomes needle like. I wonder I have been a strong woman or the almighty can end my beats so I wont have to go through the weak part where i feel the stuff so deep yet i think the dictionary should not had have a word like love in it. it hurts and it hurts a lot and loneliness hurts more.
wrote it in Urdu after a year to my father’s death completed about what i felt the night before my father passed away. here is the meaning of it in English. Jia is my nick name
A year back from now, it was a strange night, i was having strange feelings, i felt like God is telling me that I will take away your dad but I pushed away the stupid though not remembering it. but the next day it was true God took him away.
#Fatima Hasan Zaidi
I knew girl a few months back who was such a lazy, sleepy girly that she used used to sleep all the time. Whenever anyone asked; the answer used to be might be sleeping, she is sleeping, sleeping of course or just about to sleep. But then as her dad passed away everything changed. She lost her dear baba and she was lost in herself. She lost the way she used to sleep, everything changed and all is that she about her baba along the breaths she take. She communicates in the air assuming baba to be with her and listening to her voice and dreadfully even at nights she is unable to sleep. All she does is try to put herself to sleep by calling baba and asking him that Baba
Bohat der ho gai hai, Jia sona chahti hai, Jia ko aak sulaa dein…
Translates: It is too late, Jia wants to sleep coma and put her to sleep.
I miss you a lot baba.
Jia is my pet name..
BY: Fatima Hasan Zaidi
“We had a fellowship, a bond a relationship so solid!
I’d never thought these days would come seeing no you
It’s so hard to admit the certainty you’r gone until the end of time
I recall how your arms hold me and provide for me value
I recall the last time I held your hand and how you looked at me
The world stopped and my heart quitted pulsating when they told you were gone
No words I compose could ever say
How tragic and vacant I feel today
The Angels aimed to get you
Much sooner than of else
Why did you need to go away?
Why wasn’t it perfect for you to stay?
Admire him truly and I know he’ll watch over me
What I’m lasting appears to be uncalled for
Anyhow one thing is for sure
My love for you will regularly be there
A thousand verses won’t bring you back
I know the words that I wrote
Not even those thousand tears
I know as they fall from my eyes
Presently you’re up in Heaven
With the Angels up above
To them I told I love you more”
By # Fatima Hasan Zaidi #
Life is uncertain, it happens when we are unaware that we will get birth on a land and then will be loved by people then they become an important part of our being.
I belong to a dignified man, Dr. MASOOD HASAN ZAIDI who was a senior govrnment servant; Consultant Anesthetist in Benazir Bhutto Hospital. Where he served the humanity by his profession he served the land of the brave as well, known as Pakistan as a devoted child of Pakistan by curing the injured and showed the devotedness of a true Pakistani; every year.
As August started, he required a badge to put on his shirt while going on duty to BBH Rawalpindi clipping it on shirt was an obligation, ‘phuljarri’ was his favourite and listening to national songs around the month and I being his daughter followed his steps along.
This year, it is all so different as he passed away to the eternal world suddenly by heartattack on 17 July 2014. This sad demise of my father left me in craving nothing in the month of August.
Today, as his memories flew by my side I remembered the August last year and the lightening near parliament house. No doubt he gave me beautiful memories and I am nothing without him. All the time he asked me to care about Pakistan, to make it prosperous but left me with his uncountable wishes for the nation.
My days and nights are differnt, I am without baba but being his daughter will fullfil his desires.
So I thought to put Pakistan’s flag for you because I love you.
Proud Pakistanis, we are 🙂